I found it!

I was poking around my classroom today, trying to find a gizmo for the whatchamacallit, and I got to thinking about some of the really absurd things we Americans (and others maybe?) say when we're looking for things.  Some are blatantly obvious, some are hyperbolic statements, some are just asinine, but none lends any value to the search. 

• "Where could it be now?"  And just who are you expecting to answer?
  
• "I just saw it."  Well, no, probably not.  If this were true, you would have found it.
  
• "I can't find it anywhere!"  This is just an unfinished sentence.  It should be "I can't find it anywhere I have looked."
  
• "I've looked everywhere."  Obviously not.  If you had, you would have found it. 
  
• "It must be somewhere."  Um, yeah.  It can't be nowhere, now can it? 
  
• "I've looked high and low."  Any chance it could be somewhere in the middle?
• "It was in the last place I looked."  Well duh!  This is true by definition, unless you keep looking after you find it.
  

These come from a human's requirement to babble incessantly and not look like a moron.  Especially if there are multiple people looking, saying things like this make the initial searcher seem like less of an imbecile.

People are funny.